What is manhood and how can it be measured?
During a recent search, I diligently sought for a definition of manhood. In other words, what is manhood and how would I know when I’ve officially entered into it? To my surprise, the results were grim. Why is that? What’s interesting is the fact that many of us have an idea of what it might be, but no one really knows what it is. If our definitions of manhood can’t be accurately measured, then why do we place so much emphasis on being or becoming a man? To add more intrigue to this discussion, many of us say things like, “I’m the man”, “I’m a grown man”, “I’m a real man”, or my favorite, “Man up”, yet all these aimless quotes seem to lead back to a unicorn that apparently doesn’t exist. Even our theories of manhood are based on generational, rehashed myths that many of us have unquestionably believed. To further authenticate my position, let’s examine a few of these beliefs to determine which ones, you’ve blindly embraced as the truth.
Age Milestones
Is age the true indicator of manhood? If so, when does age automatically transform a male into a man? In
Jewish culture, a boy is considered a man at the tender age of 13. Would you consider a 13-year-old teenager a man? In American culture, sixteen, eighteen, and twenty-one are all regarded as significant “manhood” milestones. Sixteen-year-olds can drive a vehicle, eighteen-year-olds are permitted to vote, and twenty-one-year-olds can officially buy alcoholic beverages. Frankly, I don’t know any twenty-one-year-old males who don’t consider themselves to be a man. Lastly, if age is the only gateway into manhood, then that creates two problems. First, which age is the official manhood threshold and two, most connotations related to manhood have been signified by maturity (i.e. “grown” man). Is there any age mentioned above that epitomizes maturity?
Achieving Status
Is status the true indicator of manhood? What is status? Status is a social, economic, professional, materialistic, or any other undefined “manmade” pedestal individuals inspire to achieve. Since you may not recognize the term status in its concentrated form, let me break it down even further. Associated within the idea of status is money, influence, authority, power, resources, and charisma. Why? It’s simple…people envy these characteristics; therefore, merit is ascribed to them. Knowing this, here is the catch, status can be actual or perceived. It is the underachievers who place considerable value on their perception of another’s success. Which implies, status can be gained or lost. If a male’s status alone establishes his manhood, then losing status should also jeopardize it.
Can manhood be achieved from a rite of passage? What is a rite of passage? It’s an event that marks a significant stage in a person’s life. Typically, when our society references a rite of passage, the most common is the date of birth, puberty, marriage, childbearing, or death. Since this is a masculine blog, allow me to highlight a few more events that I know commemorated “your” gateway into manhood.
Losing your virginity
Graduating high school or any other institution of higher learning
Making a first major purchase (house, vehicle, etc.)
Having sex with multiple women (threesomes, orgies, etc.)
First time experiencing an ejaculation, masturbation, fellatio, etc.
First time getting high or drunk
First time joining a gang or “elite “organization
If none of these apply to you, then tell me what event solidified your manhood?
As you can clearly see, there are many rites of passage that supposedly lead to manhood. Given that this is the case, “Houston, we have a problem!” Which of these passages is the one? Is there anyone who can assist us in solving this riddle?
Possessing a Penis
Does possessing a penis automatically equate to manhood? What do you think? Is the male reproductive organ the only distinct way of knowing a male attained manhood? If you said “yes” without carefully considering the question, please read it once more. If you’ve decided not to change your response, help me to understand the following:
There are adult toy shops everywhere that sell artificial male genitals. If a female buys one, does she enter manhood by default or due to possession? Nowadays, this is a very interesting and controversial topic that we’ll discuss later.
What about hermaphrodites or intersexed individuals? Do we slap a manhood tag on them too?
What about newborn boys? Do they slide right out of the birth canal into manhood since they possess a penis?
What about a female who undergoes a sex change? Is she a manhood candidate?
In conclusion, we have discovered that the reality known as manhood is subjective, not objective. Meaning, it isn’t a definitive term, although many of us deem it to be so. This fact alone has led to various misunderstandings and confusion. No worries, Men Have Feelings Too will tackle these inaccurate sources of contention at a later time. In the meanwhile...
Leave a comment. I want to hear from you. What is your definition of manhood? Better yet, what does the term or ideology of manhood mean to you?
Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com
"Buy the truth and don't sell it"
