Men Have Feelings Too - Selah

The word Selah is a technical musical term that shows accentuation, interruption, pause, or suspension of music. In this life, we must also take the time to pause from the mundane tasks that we perform under the sun. As 2016 slowly comes to an end, let's make the time to regroup, revise, and project for 2017. This past year came with many ups and downs, triumphs and failures, and twists and turns. If you fail to objectively examine your pursuits, failures, and convictions from 2016, you will be at a great disadvantage in the coming new year. Listed below are a few things to consider.

What are your short and long-term goals for 2017?
How many goals did you set and accomplish in 2016?
If you set goals for yourself in 2016, why didn't you complete all of them? How long did you procrastinate before starting them?
What are your greatest weaknesses, distractions, and challenges? How do you plan to overcome them?

I encourage you to STOP making excuses. Take the rest of this year to reflect upon your life, convictions, and goals then make the necessary adjustments.

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - Public Superheros Private Failures

This morning I began a conversation with a man by asking him the following. "What is the greatest challenge in your marriage?" He responded, "Trying to keep proper balance in my home." I then asked, "What do you mean?" He went on to say, "Trying to keep the proper balance between work and home. I spent many years serving this country as a U.S. Marine. Among my guys, I was well respected. They had my back and I had theirs. It was nothing to constantly devote 14 hours of my day leading them, training them, and looking after their personal needs. However, when I went home after my long day, my family didn't receive the same enthusiasm. They only got what I had left...if that. If they had a roof over their heads, food to eat, clothes to wear, and they were in 'good' health then my home life was considered good." As this conversation continued, he further explained how his military lifestyle and deployments strained his marriage and adversely affected his relationship with his children. After many unproductive arguments with his wife, repeated threats of divorce, and various disrespectful encounters with his children, he finally came to grips with this very stressful social imbalance.

Many people, especially men, simultaneously live as public superheros and private failures. To the outside world, they are great men, leaders, and the movers and shakers of our society. Privately or within their homes, they are null and void, absent, distant, and unapproachable. Most of their home life is spent arguing with their wives, fighting against their wayward, undisciplined children, and consuming drugs and alcohol in a desperate effort to escape these pressures. To further cope with the social imbalances within their households, many have found justification outside: like in the strip clubs, other social organizations where acceptance is the primary affirmation, or within the bed of "another" who willingly consoles them. Inwardly they know their condition is terminal but as long as they can keep their private life private, they'll continue to fool the masses by deceitfully pretending everything is great at home. Just because many of us live our lives this way, doesn't mean that it's right.

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - Why Do Married Men Cheat?

Why married men cheat, better yet, why men cheat has been a hot topic for eons. Many have struggled to understand this epidemic, yet attempting to explain it has always produced more questions than answers. One major reason for this phenomenon is most of those explanations have come from a bias source. In other words, men are not typically the forerunners when it comes to disclosing their wrongful deeds. Generally, it's women who have derived their unreliable reasoning from their own personal experiences. This alone has caused more confusion because it's based upon a woman's perception not reliable truth. Now, here's the twist. This time this information will be brought to you from a man's perspective.

So, why do married men cheat? Well, some of those reasons may surprise you. Starting in 2017, Men Have Feelings Too will be uncovering one reason per month. Although, this sensitive topic will produce mixed feelings, we must stop skating around the issue and deal with it. For the women, this information will be like a drug but for the men, most would rather I not speak. Having said that, let me lay some necessary groundwork.

First, ALL married men don't cheat? Secondly, the reason why this blog is only addressing the married men instead of the single ones is because pop culture expects the single ones to cheat. In other words, the institution of marriage is still respected to a slight degree. Third, married men have much more to lose than the single ones. Finally, if or when the institution of marriage is destroyed, society as a whole will crumble.


Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - Five Categories of Fathers

Many people believe that all fathers are created equal. Well this misconception couldn't be farther from the truth. In fact, fatherhood at large is subdivided into five categories. Allow me to break this down for you.

Absent Father - An "absent" father should be self-explanatory. This type is non-existent or if there's any interactions with his children, it's extremely limited.

In The House but Not of The House Father - A father who is "in the house but not of the house" is one who physically resides with his own children, but he's routinely standoffish and detached when it comes to spending time with, nurturing, cultivating, and training them.

Distant Father - A "distant" father is one who doesn't physically reside with his own children, but he makes every attempt to be a part of their lives.

Surrogate Father - A "surrogate or stepfather" is one who assumes the role of father for children that aren't biologically his.

In The House and of The House Father - A father who is "in the house and of the house" is exactly how it sounds. This type physically lives in the same residence with his children, and he's involved in every aspect of their lives.

Why is this fundamental understanding necessary? First, if you desire to be an excellent father this information is mandatory. Secondly, there are many pitfalls associated with each of these categories that must be considered and understood. Just having this essential understanding will not only aid you in your current fatherly role but it will also reveal distinctive tendencies, weaknesses, and strengths that I know you’ve never contemplated. If you choose to remain ignorant to these distinguishing factors, THEY will plague YOU. Later, we'll dig deeper into these categories, but for now, my goal was to stretch your mind by introducing them to you. If you can't wait until we discuss them individually, you can obtain this priceless, sought after knowledge NOW on my website.

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - The Two Classic Games

Since the beginning of time, two classic games have constantly influenced the lives of many. They are played so often that many of us have willingly accepted them as our default setting. Without question, they have destroyed and plagued numerous relationships, annihilated trust, and tormented ALL of their victims. As a result, many of us live with permanent internal scars, which were caused by poisonous fragments that hid within the recesses of our hearts.

Do you know the two classic games I'm referencing? Sure, you do; you instinctively play them all of the time. For now, I'll only introduce them. Later on, we'll discuss their rules and implications.

Game 1 - "Guess Who"

"Guess Who" A.K.A. "The Manipulation Game" is played every day. This game involves the "Art of Manipulation" through the medium of deception to control and subdue its opposition. Many of us have renamed this game as "GAME."

Game 2 - "The Blame Game"

"The Blame Game" is also played every day. This game deceitfully forces others to take liability and responsibility for our shortcomings by ascribing our perceived crime to them or another object.


Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - The Enemy In-A-Me

Who's your worst enemy? Could it be the guy you thought was your friend prior to him betraying you? Could it be your "Ex" after you discovered that she cheated, turned your children against you, and then had you falsely arrested? Could it be the guy who was secretly pursuing your woman, disrespecting your home, or stealing money from you? Could it be the woman that you thought was the ONE until she cleaned out your bank account? Although all of these situations are deal breakers in their own right, none of them compare to your greatest enemy. Despite popular opinion, YOU are your OWN worst ENEMY.

Take into account how many times you've allowed the FEAR of failure, the unknown, and your past to derail you or cloud your judgments. Also, take into account how many times you've allowed your destructive habits, lustful appetites, or immediate gratification to rule YOU. Consider how many times you've violated your own conscience, will, standards, or morals. Also, consider how many times you've lied to yourself, you were deceived by your feelings, or you were misled by your OWN heart after you decided to follow it. Certainly, I know that you can find millions of excuses to justify your thoughts and behaviors; however, if you'll carefully examine each of your shortcomings, you'll discover that YOU'RE the common denominator!

I know that many of you may not want to address these real to life issues. You would rather hide behind your perceived strengths, accolades, professions, or other superficial veneers. The truth of the matter is this, READY or NOT, here it comes.

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - Males vs. Men

Apparently, over the years, there has been some type of confusion as it relates to two terms that many of US believe are synonymous. Male vs. man are the two words that I am referencing. What is a male? What is a man? Is there a difference? If so, could one of you be so nice as to explain the difference? If there isn't a difference then why do many say some of the following statements?

1. Quite often a male will say to another male, "You're the man!" (Instead of, you're the male?) What does "you're the man" truly mean or imply?

2. Quite often a woman will say to a male, "You're not a real man? A real man does 'this' or a real man does 'that.'" What do her statements imply? Better yet, what could her statements possibly mean?

I know this may seem to be an elementary topic but if you really knew the ramifications of this then you wouldn't be so hasty to dismiss this discussion. Honestly, this will become a very sensitive matter once we begin to truthfully and objectively dissect it. Just to stir the pot in advance, let me say this. Every man is a male, but not every male is a man.

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - Setting Ground Rules

To be successful at anything, you must set ground rules, boundaries, and rules of engagement. All of these foundational blocks are necessary components that must be established and maintained. Well, this blog is no different. Listen up!

1. Although the intended audience of my book is men, this blog is unisex. Which means, ALL correspondence is welcomed here (male or female). Feel free to get involved.    
2. Each blog will be written as if men are my intended audience unless specified. 
3. This is an interactive blog. I welcome and encourage differences of opinion. If you leave a comment, ask a question, or give your feedback, please be respectfully and allow for differences of opinion. Please, no profanity. Let's behave like mature adults. If for some reason you can't tolerate my viewpoint or someone else's comments, feedback, or opinions in a respectfully manner, then this blog may not be for you. 
4. For the most part, this will be a weekly blog. There are two reasons for this. One, I want to give you ample time to reflect upon each week's topic because some of them will be difficult to discuss due to sensitive content. Two, I want to encourage dialogue. Sometimes talking about an issue helps those who maybe dealing with it to see it differently; thereby, increasing their ability to cope.  
5. This blog will address issues that many won't truthfully discuss. Topics include manhood, fatherhood, roles and responsibilities, relationships (especially, interpersonal ones), abuse, addictions, matters of the heart, etc. Since most of US wear superficial masks in our day to day lives, we have become quite comfortable with lying to ourselves. Conversely, TRUTH will expose our vulnerable hearts causing us to reflect upon our hidden motives. This alone makes this blog unique.
6. If you have any additional topic suggestions, please send me an email.

Until next time...

Written by Walter Hunter

walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com

https://menhavefeelingstoo.com

Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too - The Canvas

Canvas...the canvas or backdrop for The Men Have Feelings Too Movement was birthed from a very dark place. Dark? What do I mean? A few years ago, I went through one of the most horrific times in my personal life. Life's fierce hand brought me to tears, apathy, and hopelessness. After months of searching for relevant masculine literature, someone in whom I could confide, or someone who might understand my plight, I gave up trying because no one or thing met these strict qualifications. As a result, I became a walking time bomb. I intentionally woke up every morning secretly wishing that someone would push my buttons so that I could find just cause for unloading on them.

After realizing my toxic dilemma, I became angry with myself, which only compounded the problem. What was I to do? I'll tell you what I did. To my surprise, I started a journal in order to cope. In my journal, I wrote all of those horrendous events out exactly as I had experienced them. Although this took me about a year to do, it was worth it in retrospect. After these events were carefully drawn out of my heart and unto something tangible, I can honestly say that I felt better about my situation. Despite the fact that none of my problems immediately went away, at least the pressure they caused had been temporarily lifted. To protect my heart from any further damage, I put this draft in a safe place and went on with my life.

About a year after this, I stumbled upon the draft that I had previously written. WOW...is all I could say. After rereading it, I instantly knew that I wasn't the only man who has ever experienced this. Apparently, this essential groundwork is now known as Men Have Feelings Too. With this in mind, let me also share another type of canvas with you.

The Men Have Feelings Too image was also designed with it's own meaning. Since today must be your day, I'll explain it's design to you. 

• The black face represents the dark, shameful past that most of US desire to keep hidden.
• The red heart depicts our life now. If you noticed, the heart becomes more vibrate, as it gets closer to the edge. However, the part that's closer to the face is lighter or slightly discolored. This is because many of us know that, internally, we're an empty hot mess that's being forced to carry around destructive baggage from our past. Yet externally, we want everyone else to believe that we're strong and we have it all together.
• The blotches on the heart depict that we ALL have different wounds (insecurities, issues, shortcomings, etc.) and they're in different stages of healing.  

Until next time...

Written by Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


Feel free to leave comments or feedback.

Men Have Feelings Too Introduction

Our Blog's Intent

Men Have Feelings Too would like to present to some and introduce to others our blog. Here, our ultimate goal is to highlight our main attraction...Men. Before you run off believing the wrong thing, allow me the opportunity to quantify my statement. The Men Have Feelings Too platform was created to provide men with masculine literature meant to equip, educate, and inspire them to be better men, fathers, and husbands. The word "better" implies that we are not the perfect beings many of us believe that we are. Which implies that there must be areas of our personal lives that require necessary introspection and correction. If you're reading our introduction and our main goal and your intent for reading our blog don't align themselves, then I respectfully ask you upfront to discontinue your reading immediately. With that being said, Welcome to The Men Have Feelings Too Blog.

Before you hastily stop reading our blog believing it's a waste of time, I dare you to pull up a chair, listen to what's being conveyed, and offer your input. Just to clear the air, this is not your average blog. If you like superficial topics, discussions that don't provoke thought, passive thinking that doesn't produce personal growth, or fairy-tale endings then this is not the blog for you. Furthermore, if you're easily offended by differences of opinion then keep watching television or other forms of meaningless media meant solely for your entertainment. That way, you can continue to ignore the real issues. However, if you desire truth and want to be better equipped for some of life's challenges then you came to the right place. Let me say this, don't prejudge this blog and start bad-mouthing it before you get the chance to really see what it's all about. Just be patient my friend. At some point, we will speak directly to you as if you secretly told us your story beforehand. Until the next time, consider this the introduction.

Written by Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com