Men Have Feelings Too - Marriage Changes Things

Earlier this week, I engaged a 27 year old male in what I believed to be an interesting conversation. Our discussion centered around being a man, taking responsibility, and exhibiting impactful leadership before one's family. Just to set the stage, this young guy has two children by two different women. His oldest child is by his ex-girlfriend. His youngest child is by his current in-house girlfriend. Currently, they share a bed, parenting responsibilities, domestic duties, and the like. The only thing they don't share is a bank account. He also claimed to love her but he added, "I just want to be happy." As our conversation progressed I asked, "Since you're already doing the job, why don't you marry her?" He replied, "marriage changes things." Being the guy that I am I asked, "marriage changes what?" After talking in circles for the next few minutes, he finally answered, "I'm not ready for all of that yet."

Currently, there are numerous individuals who are afraid of getting married because they believe the dynamics of their 'marriage-like' relationship will change. As silly as this may sound, this mindset and lifestyle is so common that it's scary. Everybody outside of wedlock craves the benefits of marriage without actually being married. They desire the comforts of monogamy without legal commitment. Many have wasted valuable years, have become physically and emotionally vested, and have played the fool all because another individual didn't love them enough to wholly commit to them. Although these same outcomes can manifest because of divorce, at least there are consequences that were designed to protect both parties. What else did you expect to happen when WE have minimized, distorted, and devalued the true purpose and safeguards created by marriage?

Until next time...

Walter Hunter
walter@menhavefeelingstoo.com
https://menhavefeelingstoo.com


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